Tonight I Become an Opera Singer

Woot! Great voice lesson this morning. Before the lesson I went with Alex and Husband to most of Alex's lesson. What a way to warm up! Besides warming up vocally, in Alex's class we had to run and stomp around the room according to the speed of a rhythm the teacher played. There was other running, standing and sitting and so on. A full body warm-up. Then I went to my lesson. We went over Una Donna. I rang out that G, for the most part. My teacher gave me some tips. Nothing new - more like reminding me things, like, jumping off the lower note to bounce to the G, and not thinking of it as a jump. Same old story. We didn't sing too much. After that we went through the song books together to think about what other songs I'd like to eventually sing. She is so sad she can't make it tonight but I'm going to text her right after I sing to let her know how I thought I did. She said that she has found that the things we worry about the most before a performance usually go fine, and we can be surprised by what does go in an unexpected direction. That, she said, is the joy of live performance.

After the lesson I went straight to Sondra's for a fabulous massage. Then we went out to a coffee shop for lunch, and now Alex and I have been playing all afternoon. Soon I'll neti (again) and then start getting ready, no doubt far to early. Then I'll sit around in my nice clothes trying not to sweat. I wrote that somewhere, was it here, yesterday? That wouldn't surprise me. I'm very excited and a bit nervous, which means my brain is even looser and wigglier than it usually is.

So here we go!! Two and a half years of lessons, and now I'm singing opera with other opera singers in front of an opera crowd. WOW!!!!

Picky Choosy

Had a pretty good voice lesson yesterday. Told my teacher about next week's auditionesque thing. We picked over Una Donna and also the Tipsy Waltz. She said either would be fine. I said I would ask my readers and she was into that. So now y'all have to listen to my teacher and help me pick which one to sing.

Tipsy Waltz is mezzo, French and short.
Una Donna is soprano, Italian and long.

I was home alone all day today so I recorded them and then put them together in a "Which one?" video. Here you go. And as you listen and remember that I will continue to practice connecting to the breath, using the low abs, dropping my jaw and all that other stuff for a fuller, more rounded sound. Please post a comment with your vote. Thanks!



Another benefit of being home alone all day was that I could sing without being told to shut up. Uh I mean, to stop singing. I didn't really sing all day, but at one point I put on this CD I had made of the accompaniment for all the pieces I've learned and I sang through that. I also faked through Art is Calling for Me. Last week I promised my teacher I wouldn't sing it yet and we didn't have time to get to it yesterday so I was just being goofy and not really singing it. No one was here to tell me to stop and the neighbors are all too polite. Although suddenly everyone was mowing their lawn... surely a coincidence...

My teacher had to cancel next week's lesson but I'll be calling her after I sing for the group.

So let's see, particulars from yesterday's lesson ... just picky stuff about pronunciation and timing in the songs, the lippiness of French and so on. Breath, using the abs, staying grounded, the usual stuff. She says she loves seeing how far I've come and how much better things sound now. That's nice to hear. And vocal exercises to practice... uh... yeah she gave me some but of course I don't remember them at the moment. Luckily they're all on the tape... assuming, of course, that it recorded.

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EDITING TO ADD:
No I'm not pregnant. I poof out my stomach to breathe and that adds to the fat to make it look like I'm 6 months along, but I'M NOT!!!!! !!!!!!!
Guess it's time to step up that diet and exercise regime...
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Wheeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Wow that was SO MUCH FUN!!! I loved performing tonight!! I started out a bit wobbly. I know I made some mistakes, and there are a few cracks in there, and so on, but it didn't matter. I had a blast!







Everyone did pretty well except for the poor girl who went right after me. She's 11 years old. Yes, 11. She pulled a total Cindy Brady and just froze up there. She looked down and mumbled the songs, forgot the words, plundered on through, but she stayed up there through both songs! She sat and cried through the rest of the evening. She was so brave to stay up there! As soon as it was over I went over to tell her how brave I thought she was, and how it'll get easier, and so on.

At the end I gave flowers to my teacher and the accompanist. Then I went out with a friend who had come to support me. Husband had already left with 5 year old Alex (I still CANNOT believe that he's FIVE!!!) pretty much right after I performed, as it would have been asking far too much of Alex to have him sit still and quietly through all the other singers.

Now I want to perform again. It gets easier every time. More, I want more! Wheeeeeee!!!!!

Birthday, Rehearsal, Hooray!

Birthday party rehearsal day! Wait, no. We didn't have a rehearsal for the birthday party! We DID have a birthday party today because it's Alex's 5th birthday today! WOW!!!!! And in the middle I snuck out for the rehearsal for tomorrow's recital. The sound in the chapel was amazing! At first I was a bit overwhelmed by the echo, but once I got used to it I loved it! My sis-in-law came with me and made a little movie. Notice that when she zooms in, the sunlight catches in my frizzy hair and creates quite the halo. I will use Product tomorrow to smooth it down.



So this is the "middle" version of the song. One of my voice teacher's colleagues took the soprano version of the song and transposed it down so it's in between the mezzo and soprano versions we already had. This was my first time singing it through in that key, and the first time with a real live accompanist. I still need to fix where I breath for some of the lines.

When we arrived at the chapel, the piano had this cover strapped to it with a padlock. My voice teacher had a security dude in there trying to open it. He had this huge ring of keys and he was on his back under the piano trying them all... nothing. He left to look for more keys. Meanwhile, the accompanist comes in, picks up the edge of the cover, gives it a flick and the straps all undo. It was like Fonzie and the jukebox. (Sorry, can't find a link for that.)

If Music went pretty well, and then in the middle of Despina we got off the rhythm near the end so we redid that part. And for some reason I messed up the words right at the beginning - I anticipated in "de saper" and sang "se saper." I've never done that before! I won't do it tomorrow. I also got the melody wrong the first time I sang, "e qual regina." Again, I anticipated and sang it the way it goes the 2nd time around. And then the last 'col posso e voglio" bit I was a bit too pushy. All things I can fix. So anyway I edited the clips to make it look like one run through, although you will be able to tell where the cut is.




Even though there was only 5 other people there (the rehearsal was staggered), I got that performance rush and wanted to just hug everyone afterward.

I'm hooked.

Hopefully someone will record it tomorrow. Wheeee my first recital experience!!!!!

Ready! Set! GO!

Ever since my resolution to sing like no one is listening, my voice lessons have been great. Truly great. Today we did Una Donna again and again, my teacher told me how much I've improved, and, ready for this: That I'm ready to sing it for other people!! Of course I still have a few bits and pieces of it to work on, but for the most part she was pleased and excited.

One of the things I find myself doing is swallowing down on certain sound combinations, which she said is from letting my palate down or something like that. It happens on -ar sounds, like the part that goes, "De un momento, dar retta a cento" and when I get to "dar" I sort of swallow it and it comes out a little nasally for the rest of the line. She kept telling me to imagine a peppermint feeling opening up my throat. I wasn't quite connecting to that so I tried to think it forward, and I sang it forward, which essentially did the same thing - it kept things open in the back of my throat and let the sound resonate out. She also said to sing it like I'm saying it. I have to practice that because she said it afterwards and then we moved on to the next thing.

I'm excited to think of how much progress I've made since I started lessons in the fall of 2007. Seriously. I could carry a tune just fine but it was all chest voice and belty. I never imagined in a million years that I was a soprano. I never in a trillion years imagined that I'd ever be able to sing opera. I do recognize that I don't have that full, I don't know, you know how good singers produce a sound that resonates through your body when you listen? I don't think I can produce that... but then again, I never thought I'd be able to sing the way I do now, so who knows?

Next week we'll touch Una Donna one more time and then jump back to the Tipsy Waltz. Starting to think about something from Nozze, seeing as how I'm sort of obsessed with it right now.

And now, take a look! I had it cut and straighted (blow dry and iron) today. Short!!!!

Despina Returns

Voice lesson tonight. Went back in time and reviewed Una Donna. Only it wasn't back in time - it was right now. All those little bits I had trouble with last year - the note jumps, the legato at certain parts - no problems. Of course now there are new things to work on... always something new... which actually I just love! We're getting into the little details of what sounds start and end what notes and how the legato sort of slides together and when to start or end a consonant sound... and I love it.

When I left the room, the mom of the next student was in the hallway and she started grilling me. "Are you soprano? Which one? Soprano 1 or 2?" Um... what? And then she asked all sorts of unrelated stream-of-consciousness questions about my teacher, what she charges, does she sing now, then about what I sing, about her daughter having only 1 elective next year and should she take flute or voice? One question after another. Meanwhile, a headache was creeping up the back of my neck and I had chills and all I could think about was going home, taking Tylenol and getting under my blanket. So I told her, make an appointment with the guidance counselor and see if you can't fit both in somehow. She went on to describe other school scheduling issues and I kept telling her, talk to your daughter's teachers or guidance counselor... tell them what you want and ask how they can help... we parents are the only advocates for our children... and so on. Then I ran out so I could get home, medicate and tell you, Dear Reader, all about it.

So I have a question. Now that I've ended my moratorium, does that mean I have to mention the guy in every blog post? Cuz I could scrape around for something if I had to. But I don't think I will. Go read his newly updated blog (as of this evening) if you want something. There. There's some teeny little thing. Not worthy of a tag, even.

Off I Go

I'm going to Florida tomorrow and won't be back until Monday. Here's some stuff to hold you over until then. This is all part of my "sing like no one is listening" attempt.

Yet another video of this. I never give up.



And this:



There's one more... if only I could get it to upload. But if you click through those to YouTube (and you should, so you can rate and comment... PLEASE comment with suggestions!!!) you'll see the other. If it ever uploads. Otherwise, you can see it here:
Still Singing Like No One Is Listening - Vedrai Carino



Finally, something professional. I love love love this:

The Big Race

Had about 5 minutes to myself this evening so I quick ran and made this video.

As usual, Husband and child entered the house when there were about 10 seconds to go.

I know it's riddled with mistakes. I am a Work in Progress and I'm sharing with you. All I hear are mistakes.

I call this post "The Big Race" because the piano accompaniment is so fast that I feel like I'm running a race.

Oper fur alle

My voice lessons have resumed. I don't quite feel the psychological benefit yet. Part of that is my fault. Ok, it's all my fault. The day before my lesson, I had a bizarre and dare I say, bad, dream about my voice teacher. I dreamed that I arrived for the lesson and it was in this glassed-wall building, like a store-front. Some guy was playing the piano and she was there insisting that I sing, and I kept saying that I didn't know the song so I wouldn't sing, and there's no way that these minutes were counting toward the lesson. In the dream we were yelling at each other. I finally left. Later I tried to call her to apologize but I couldn't get through. I learned that the guy playing piano was her brother and he didn't like the way I was yelling so he told her she could no longer get in contact with me. I finally went to a dinner party where they both were, and we were watching a movie about her life, and it became real (yay, dreams) and it was a part where she gets raped by some guy she had one date with. I was her roommate and I knew what was going to happen but I had to leave the apartment because I couldn't interfere with history. It was terrible. The whole thing was terrible. Then the next day I had my lesson - so that's why I wasn't able to open up. I felt guilty about the dream. I felt guilty IN the dream. Weird stuff. Gotta get over it so I can get back to work.

That said, it was a pretty good lesson. I told her about singing for my friend's mother and the other guests, and about how I rehearsed all summer, and watched the professionals, and finally how I managed to relax, use my abs to push the air and my throat just opened, allowing me to hit higher and rounder sounding notes. She said she could definitely hear the improvement. I sang Una Donna and it was much better than ever. Of course I can always do it better at home or in the car than I can during a lesson. What's up with that? Anyway, I can hear that I'm singing better, she could hear it and I could see that she was excited about it. Another of my many problems is, when she gets excited I start laughing. I had to turn my back on her at one point, and other times I just kept my eyes closed. But I can't always sing with my eyes closed, can I?

We worked on Ouvre ton Coeur. You'd never know that I studied French all through college - the pronunciation is driving me insane -- I have too much Spanish and Italian interference. Plus we were doing the words before I felt confident with the notes. Must remind myself (and my teacher, in this case) to slow down. My plan is to feel totally comfortable with each part of the song before putting it all together.

Look! One of her friends is from and/or went to Germany and brought her a t-shirt that she gave to me:




Next lesson: Thursday, Sept. 18.

Cattle Call!

Well, it happened. I sang for People yesterday. Luckily it was totally unplanned and a friendly crowd so there were no pre-singing nerves or jitters.

What happened was, the mother of one of our friends is getting surgery this coming week to get a mass removed. She is freaking out, naturally, that it might be malignant. She thinks of all of her son's friends as her "children," so she decided to have all of us over. She's your typical overly-dramatic Italian mother so, although we were all happy to go, there was this sense of, "You all have to come see me b/c it could be the last time..." Catholic/mother/Jewish (for some of us) guilt surrounding the invitation. However, it was a nice evening. At one point one of our friends pulled out his very beautiful tenor ukulele and started singing Eddie Arnold songs, which our friend's mother happens to love. I can't explain how surreal it was as we sat there singing Cattle Call, complete with the yodeling. (Go ahead, click on the link!!) And were weren't even drinking that much. Certainly not enough to break into yodeling. I joked that I could sing in Italian for her but it would have to be opera, and she was totally into it. Said she loved that scene in Moonstruck when they played that song from "that opera where the girl dies of TB," that it always makes her cry. So since she was already weepy from the Eddie Arnold, we started with sad and I sang, a capella, Lasciatemi Morire. Then I did Una Donna a quindicci anni, again with no music. I have the instrumentals on my iPod so I gave a listen to get the right starting note. I had been practicing Una Donna over the past few weeks and I really got into the character, without (I hope) compromising my singing technique. I mean, I'm sure my teacher or any other professional singer could have pointed out ways to improve... but I digress... So I explained each piece beforehand, including the opera, the context and the gist of the song. And of course I know I can sing better than I did - it was so on the spot - but I only got nervous a little partway through Lasciatemi, for some reason. Everyone applauded and hooted and were all excited - it was weird. All I could think was, "If you think I'm so good, then you obviously haven't heard real opera singers..." I mean, I was ok, like, I'm not embarrassed, which is something, but I know I can do better. Having the music would have helped. I think much of their reaction was due to the surprise factor - I've known this group of friends for like 15 years and none of them knew I had it in me. Plus the Italian - the guy who sang with the uke told me that he doesn't believe he could ever learn "all those words" in another language. My friend's mom is Italian and told me she could understand all the lyrics, which was cool. In true dramatic Italian mother style, she was just gushing about "a gift, a beautiful gift," but then she said I had to hear this singer, Paul Potts, he won a competition and he's the best opera singer ever. Amazing how hearing that can change your view of someone's praise. I mean he's not bad, but... it's obvious to me at least that he's not a professional. He must have a great deal of charisma as he has somehow charmed so many people. So then of course I played some Juan Diego for her. At first she said, "Oh, Paul Potts is as good as this guy..." but as she listened more it was obvious that she changed her mind. Nothing against Paul Potts - but he's no Juan Diego Florez.

Drinking and Singing

They don't mix! Went out with a couple of girlfriends tonight, had a few beverages, probably shouldn't be blogging, but hey, at least I'm not shopping online!!! So my one girlfriend who was driving said, "Ok, let's hear it. Sing." So I sang Una donna a 15 anni. Ouch. It was pretty good, mostly, but I can do better... I swear!! I'll have to sing again for her sober and hydrated.

Ok, off I go to shop, ha ha. No, to bed... After watching That Video just one more time.

Oh that reminds me... Nathan was in my dream last night!! Nothing scandalous... it was a sleeping dream, not a daydream... oh but I digress... I dreamed that he was directing La Traviata this summer so I sent him a message asking him if he could tell me what the supers would be doing in it so I could prepare. Then he came to rehearsal and it was really really crowded and he was leading everyone in stretching exercises. It was weird the way dreams are.

I'll probably read this tomorrow, sober and possibly hungover, and then delete the whole post, so whoever reads it before then, consider yourself lucky. (Yes Carlos I know you'll probably read it, but I think you'll be the only one... ;) )

Out of My Price Range

Well. Last week I was so cocky with my "I'm gonna OWN this aria," blah blah blah. That was after being totally overwhelmed by the sheer number of notes on the page the week before. Well the sheer overwhelmedness has returned. Really. What was I thinking? What am I thinking? I keep practicing, doing lip trills, plunking it out on my piano backwards adding one note at a time, doing the rhythms, singing the vowels only and yet it still sounds choppy and awful. I know I have legato in me, I know I can make it sound nice... but how? Why can't I do it????? I need to be slapped, seriously. I see the insanity where my confidence waxes and wanes to the extreme. I see the insanity, but can't control it. Right now I truly believe that there is no way I'll ever be able to sing this aria well. No, really. I know last week I wrote that I was on my way to owning it. Well I just peeked at the price tag, and I can't afford it.

Slow Down, You Move Too Fast

Voice lesson tonight. I sort of jumped the gun and tried to learn the entire aria in one week, tune, words and all. My teacher sent me home with instructions to sound it out on the piano, lip trill the melody, say the words to the beat while streeeetching out the vowels (legato, legato, legato) and above all not to rush to learn everything at once. I guess I knew this would happen. I want to know it all at once and be perfect and I'm too impatient to learn it the proper way. But I know that I have to follow her advice. Hey at least my pronunciation is good, when my Spanish doesn't interfere...

Also worked on vibrato. I think I was holding back because I was embarrassed, of all things. More psychology... but anyway I can do it. And then when I did the exercises and heard how it sounded I would start laughing. I ended up doing it with my back to the piano because otherwise I'd look at my teacher and laugh.

Told her how I sang Lasciatemi Morire while crawling around in the snow... I think she thought that was kind of weird... but hey it worked at the time!

So was it a voice lesson or a therapy session? .... Yes ...

On My Way to Full Ownership

Last voice lesson I was overwhelmed with the idea of singing a Mozart aria. My teacher would sing a line and I would think, "Man, I can never sound like that. Why waste our time?" But I plodded through it. Well I've had a complete change of attitude. I listened to a live recording of Cosi (From the Lyric, with Nathan Gunn...) and read the music along with the aria, then sang along, and now I remember almost all the words and have almost all the music down too. And I don't sound half bad. I understand all the words and I have my ideas about how to sing it. I think I can really have fun with it. It's cool to actually be confident about singing it! Of course that may change... One problem with my voice lesson is that we start at like 7:30 PM. It's just too late at night near the end of the work week for me. There, I couldn't hit the high notes. Ok, when I did try I ended up sharp, so... but to me that's not hitting them if I'm singing the wrong note, even if it's higher. But at home... I should have a recorder running at all times! I called my mom the other day and sang it for her - she was blown away. She asked if I was going to audition for the opera chorus. And for some reason her praise really made me feel good. Like I was a little kid and my mother is proud of me.

Singing and psychiatry, who knew?