Hearing is Believing

I still can't believe I sang at the meet and greet. I know this sappy happy feeling will fade, but I'm reveling in it now. I mean, WOW. Jared snapped his head around at the sound of my voice. A voice that he has, in part, inspired me to achieve. The whole band has, really, but you know. I was pretending that he had to be able to hear me up in that cupola in the painting! I lapsed into that trance and forgot that he was actually in the room. How ridiculous is that?! It was, as one friend pointed out to me, both thrilling and slightly horrific at the same time. But mostly thrilling! And somehow, through it all, I managed to maintain bladder control. Actually, peeing in my pants wasn't really a concern of mine. Forgetting how to talk coherently, yeah. But that's pretty much always a concern...

But yeah. Shannon fawned over me and my voice. Tomo and I talked about proper breathing. Jared... he heard me sing. And complimented my voice. I didn't even think to tell him that he has inspired me. I was just... gahhh.

My voice teacher was thrilled when I told her all about it. She said that it really took cojones to do that, and she's not surprised that I did, because I have them! She pointed out to me how validating is it to be able to sing on command and to "wow" people like that. And that often people are in awe of opera singers because opera seems so difficult and inaccessible. Was Shannon star struck? Maybe a little! Plus he was definitely impressed that I had the cojones to do it. The truth is, I felt a little uncomfortable by the attention. People were there to see them, not to hear me. She told me to get used to it. Yikes!!

I've found that people I know are impressed that I can sing an entire "song" in another language. But I don't just stand up and perform - I practice and study and learn the words and the notes and how to sing them and I practice singing them in front of people and so on. It may appear effortless in the end, which is the goal, but it's only all the prep work that makes it seem so.

And now, life resumes as before. Must must must call the vocal coach. Must must must mentally prep for my next adventure, which is seeing Nathan Gunn perform next month. And then Juan Diego Florez, Diana Damrau and Joyce DiDonato the following month. And finally, I must plan for my next adventure on Mars!