Torturing Myself

I've been getting the updates about rehearsals from a friend of mine who's supering this summer. Of course they're having a great time. And it doesn't help when she also wonders why I didn't get picked, because she thinks I'd be perfect. Of course we'll never know, but as I am just as self-centered as everyone else, I can't stop thinking that it's because of the blog and what happened last year. Of course that is total paranoia as that would mean that someone in the office would have had to remove my info from the list the super captain sent in to be forwarded to the director, and I doubt they have the time or energy to do that, plus in an ideal world they'd give everything to the director to allow him to create the best possible cast. And trust me, I've learned my lesson- I wouldn't post anything specific - just generalities about the good stuff. Oh well. Maybe someone will drop out.

Clearly I am not used to rejection without a reason.

I can hear my 25 readers thinking, "Oh no, she's not STILL whining about this, is she?" Well, yes, I am, so get over it.

So I wonder if I go back through the blog from the beginning and mark on the calendar the happy and angsty posts if we'll see a monthly pattern. There's a thought.