It's all in the mind. And the throat.

I'm happy to report that after two rounds of antibiotics and a large amount of decongestant, antihistamine, rx nasal sprays and a week of prednisone I've finally recovered from the various upper respiratory infections.

For voice I'm now learning Lasciatemi Morire, Arianna's aria, from Monteverdi's lost opera, L'Arianna, composed and produced in Mantua in 1608.

Lasciatemi morire
E chi violete voi che mi comforte
in così dura sorte,
in così gran martire?
Lasciatemi morire

I'll admit I listened to an old recording of it on YouTube and got some ideas of how to sing it. But I'm still making it my own. So there's this one note, I think it's an F, the "mi" of Lasciatemi in two places... and I was sort of clamping down on it which made it impossible for me to sing it. Finally I remembered my vow to just "sing out" so I did... and WOW. I relaxed my jaw, I felt my throat open and out came this beautiful note with vibrato. My teacher jumped up from the piano and was jumping up and down with excitement. I was able to repeat it a couple of times but I still have to practice lapsing into the relaxed mode that allowed me to sing like that. I didn't realize the extent that the voice lesson was like a counseling session. But it really is. So much of it is in the mind - I need to be able to relax and not care what anyone else thinks about how I sound - just relax and let it out. I have to LET myself do that. It's not easy but I'm working on it.

Maybe one day I'll record myself singing it and post it. Maybe.